Story of my… Multiple Sclerosis cont. - Friendship / ArtStation '22 - Part 3: Necro Engineer / Draft

While recording this video I reflected on my past, appreciating friendships and identifying warning signs....

A long time ago, I distanced myself from my close friends, unwilling to share my struggles with Multiple Sclerosis (MS) and also because of a toxic relationship I had been stuck in for a long time - without realizing it yet.

Time reveals hidden lessons, highlighting the need to cherish good relationships and eliminate bad ones. In the midst of life's challenges, friends prove themselves invaluable. Sticking by their side, especially in difficult times, triggers an inner change that can inspire others.

It is against this background that my journey with MS unfolds. As a young and ambitious 3D Graphic Artist, I struggled with exhausting deadlines that affected my health. Just one month of working more intensively led to disaster.

It was a very tough experience, which I am zooming in on in yet another one of my videos.

Text from the Video:

PART ONE:

Intro…

Hi everyone!

I trust everything is going well for you all, and if it isn't, I hope you're navigating any challenges one step at a time. Remember, there's no need to rush; take things at your own pace, considering what you can comfortably manage.

And this simple statement leads me directly to the next chapter of my story. As we pick up from where we left off - which is how the problems with MS started for me. Now I will continue with my story. Afterward, I'll provide you with a description of what you can see on the screen.

So, there it was. I received the news of the suspected MS while standing in the parking lot of my new workplace in Gliwice - Poland, a city situated some 700 kilometers away from my relatives, with whom my relationship was rather strained during that period anyway.

PART TWO:

A lost friendship...

On the other hand, I was very close to my buddies from Artifex Mundi (the group I started my 3D modeling adventure with - at that time they were in Zabrze - a city within the same urban conglomeration as Gliwice). But I couldn't discuss the MS topic with them. They had even gone the extra mile by helping me secure an apartment at the time, and it felt awkward to burden them with this matter. Somehow I couldn't do it... and as a result, our contact practically ceased to exist. Well, okay, that wasn't the only reason - there was also my at that time boyfriend, who joined me a month later and who, in everyday life, turned out to be a complete psycho… Yea…

I could talk more about the danger of toxic relationships and their destructive impact, but that's a story for another time, as it deserves its own space, which I may not have enough video time to cover now.

Looking back, it seems rather stupid to have been in such proximity to good, long-time friends and not do anything about it. The understanding has settled in with time, as some lessons only become clear years later. And after about a year I was in a totally different part of Poland and that was it. The end.

If I could change anything from that time, this is it. Do not break contact with your buddies, and although I know perfectly well that sometimes we feel that the whole universe might seem to conspire against us and we would most like to burn it to the ground, it is not worth it. Friends are important, don't abandon them, regardless of whether harm is done to you or to them. Maybe even especially when harm is done to your relatives or friends, good changes start within us, and only then an example will follow.

PART THREE:

The story continues...

However, going back to the story of my beginnings with MS. I was fine for a while, nothing happened, and that was despite the lack of medication or any medical care.

At the time, I was living in Warsaw, working as a 3D Modeler - sustaining both, myself and my now ex-boyfriend, who, despite our breakup, remained immovably entrenched in my room (no not flat, just a room), with his 20 or so highly venomous spiders - because he didn't have a job, and I was too soft-hearted... even though that I knew perfectly well what he was like and that it was very bad for me.

Anyway, at the time I was working on a so-called piecework system. This setup meant that payment was calculated on the basis of a predetermined number of days to complete a given model, and no one cared if you did it faster or slower - you get as much as someone has thought of, once you're done with your model. The problem? Times were pushed to the absolute minimum and often unrealistic.

Consequently, this frequently led to situations where I found myself working extended hours to meet these demanding deadlines. Finally, at the beginning of 2013, I got a project that I was working on from 8 AM to 8 or 9 PM, six days a week, for an entire month.

And at the end of that month, I began to feel that something was wrong - the muscles in my neck on the right side began to tense up and really hurt, and on top of that, my right hand became strangely resistant and stopped behaving as I would like it to.

I remember that somewhere at the end of last week, in the evening, I slowly began to panic. I had a serious problem moving my right hand, I could neither hold a pen or operate a mouse in the usual manner.

I will give my ex a fair amount of credit because at least then he went to the hospital with me, so I was not alone, again. However, in the end, I found myself making another hospital visit - the same evening. This time to a neurological facility, and this journey I had to take on my own.

I was examined in the emergency room and the duty doctor said it was muscle weakness and that it could actually be MS, but he needs to do more tests.

PART FOUR:

Muscle Weakness...

I don't have any specific source here with a description of what muscle weakness is, so I refer those interested to Wikipedia, the link in the description, and as usual with your help, it may find its way here on the screen in the future. Yes, I will update it.

PART FIVE:

Back to the Story...

The complication arose from my employment contract, which is known in Poland commonly as a "Junk Contract" and it's often used for 3D Artists, Concept Artists or Artists of any kind. It's without any social contributions, whether retirement or healthcare. Not that it was entirely legal, in the case of that particular company, but tell that to your employer... "The door's right there if you don't like it."

That simple.

Soo, providing for two people with my one small salary, I had no savings, and paying for tests at the hospital was not cheap. I had to call my parents and ask if they would help, oh they were not thrilled...

And this was not the end of my problems, but it is the end of this story for today. Sorry.

PART SIX:

Your Health is Important…

I'll just add one simple statement here > It's very easy to overwork yourself and destroy your health, it doesn't work like that the other way around.< Don't do that to yourselves and I know that it's easy in our industry. But, just don't do that, respect yourselves and your health.

PART SEVEN:

CH03 - Necro Engineer…

Well. Now that you know what surprises MS can bring to a person, I can use what little time I still have left in this video to tell you about my twisted gnome.

For those who may have missed the previous video or for those who could use a reminder, the order in which I display my characters depends on the order in which they were created, not on their given numbers.

This small, cheerful, and definitely inconspicuous fellow that is created before your eyes belongs to the race of gnomes. While gnomes are often whacky and create very strange inventions, they are not likely to be evil. Here we are dealing with an exception - a gnome who has lost himself in his research and experiments so much that he has lost all breaks and buried his own conscience under a pile of dead bodies.

Yekur Rebblesimp… whatever, something like that… I don't know. BIO introduction will provide you with a slightly enhanced understanding of his character, and you can find an expanded version on my ArtStation challenge page - link in the description below:

In the beginning, Yekur was a simple engineer. He worked in a workshop inherited from his father and was highly respected in his community. He had an unusual knack for mechanisms that improved the work of others significantly. He knew a bit about magic, as his father ensured that Yekur developed this talent as well, although it was not the main passion of the young gnome at the time.

As the years went by and he became increasingly frustrated with the diminishing value of his work, Yekur began to have more and more recourse to magic, even venturing out on search expeditions to explore new possibilities. On further expeditions, he became increasingly fascinated by how it was possible for a dead body, brought to life with the help of magic, to be able to function so well... And what if his engineering skills were combined with necromancy.

PART EIGHT:

On the screen...

There hasn't been a significant shift regarding the method behind creating this concept. It's still a simple sketch, which I later redrawn clean and didn't fill with a grayscale anymore, like with Arnys - it was simply a waste of my time at that moment. Probably this is due to the fact that I don't really like creating shading in the form of a grayscale on a screen, and then colorizing everything, piece by piece.

While I'm at ease working with a pencil, there's a strange disconnect when it comes to translating that comfort onto the monitor screen for me. I'll probably have to practice it properly at some point to get rid of this problem. But for this project, I've stayed with the option of creating lights and shadows directly in the rendering stage.

PART NINE:

Small change of Plans...

You know, I really enjoy making these videos, I get personal satisfaction from it - that it can potentially help someone. Even now a new idea has come to me just like that, but the problem is the amount of time it takes me to do it all - and I do it all by myself - recording, editing, graphics, etc. - no one helps me with it.

Now - not that long after I was unexpectedly reduced at my work due to the lack of new assignments, despite a very positive annual evaluation - I'm trying to find something new... I'm also making my own 3D models that I plan to sell, but I'm having trouble with time, oh the irony.

Therefore, probably temporarily, but still I am forced to extend the gaps between my videos to three weeks or so. Maybe sometimes I'll be able to upload something faster, but by doing so I'll be reducing my time buffer, and I want to earn something too. So I hope you can understand that.

I definitely need to learn how to process these videos faster, more efficiently, and more interesting for you, but it's also a process in which I need to make templates for myself - which is already partially done - and I need to gain practice and experience. Not everything will be perfect right away, here I'm not fooling myself at all. Otherwise, I still wouldn't have published anything... And that would get me nowhere.

Speaking of getting somewhere, today's video has been brought to a finish, and that means I'll see you most likely, in another three weeks, where I'll be showing you the process of making my Draco-Orc sketch and continue with my story.

Meanwhile, bye-bye! Don't forget to show your support by liking, subscribing, and sharing your valuable thoughts regarding this video! Until we meet again, take care and stay engaged.

PART TEN:

Just in case...

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And again - I am not a doctor or any medical professional. The information I share is based on my personal observations, insights from healthcare providers, physical therapists, and various written sources. It's important to note that what works for me may not necessarily be suitable or effective for others. Before adopting any practices or techniques mentioned be me, I strongly advise you to consult with a healthcare professional to ensure that you are not putting yourself at risk or causing harm.

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Thanks for watching!

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Muscle Weaknes: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_weakness

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#Art #Concept #MS #Health #Story #Challenge